I am not coping with COVID. COVID is coping with me.

When we first got news of the pandemic and school was closed, all I wanted was a hug from someone I hadn’t met 3 months ago. (I arrived to Toronto on January 1^st this year, so that was not a possibility). I also needed a job. ASAP. I was scared and lonely. That first week, while classes were being moved online, I was only able to give life my 20%. I had assignments I didn’t turn in on time, but wisely, never stopped working on. This is how I internalized something I’d known in theory for years: in a crisis, you have to keep moving forward, even if it’s like a snail. This forced me to be kind to myself for not working at full speed and made it obvious if I wanted to make it, I needed to be in the present. Being terrified I didn’t have a job, in a falling economy, while running out of money, was not serving me. Interestingly enough, when that week finished, I got a job sanitizing COVID. This cemented my internal shift, making me grateful for the virus. It “gave” me a job, which allows me to go out in the sun, get fresh air, interact with people, make money and have a purpose to get up every morning. A lot of people I know with the “privilege” to stay at home, “keeping safe”, are struck with mental health issues derived precisely from the lack of all the things COVID has gifted me. So to sum it up: Keep those life lessons coming, Corona.